Monday, June 21, 2010

Tonight when I got home, I hugged my boys just a little bit tighter and for a little bit longer when saying hello. We stayed up and enjoyed being a family tonight, even past normal bedtime, just because. My "I love you's" were filled with even more love tonight as my precious babies went to sleep. All because life it too precious to be taken for granted.

I came home tonight from a memorial service for a friend who took her own life. I'm sad that she felt her only way out was to do that, but i'm mostly mad that she was selfish enough to not think about what this would do to her precious 3yr old little boy. He only saw his father occasionally, and lived with her full time. How is that helpless little baby suppose to understand why his mommy won't come back for him? I pray he understands the best he can and God heals his hurt soon.

I unfortunately understand depression, because I had pre partum depression with Aaron, and let me tell you it was a POWERFUL monster. BUT, as sad as I was, as much as I didn't care about anything. As much as I wish I could have crawled in a whole and NEVER had to see anyone again, the thought of Seth and little unborn Aaron kept me trying because no matter how bad I felt, I had made a choice and my responsibility was to them!!!

Her actions are something I just can't wrap my mind around so i'm not even going to try anymore. I just pray for peace, love and forgiveness to surround her family.

When I found out Sunday (yes Father's Day of all days) it gave new meaning to the time I had with my family. So yesterday I put the housework to the side and spend the day lovin on my boys. We had such a good time. We played, watched movies, went to Monday Madness which happened to be about Seth's favorite things...dinosaurs!!! He laughed at Dinosaur George so hard that at one point he fell out of his chair :) Then we made up songs and sang at the top of our lungs. We made up a new word for days we had to go to Target and Walmart...Tarmart (Seth likes it) Aaron had a blast with all the kids laughing and got so excited and would clap and do his high pitch squeal, and he tried his hand at singing with us. Precious memories were made that's for sure.

Sometimes life gets crazy and i'd like to run away, but I thank God for every minute nd have a better appreciation for all of it.

No time to do the housework,
cause my babies want to play.
No dishes, sweeping, mopping
or laundry to put away.

Today is another precious gift
that God has given to me
A day to laugh and hug my boys
and be as silly as can be

For we know not what our future holds
there are no guarantees
Our loved ones that we hold so dear
will be there for us to see

John you are my closet friend
I love you more than words can say
Seth you are my precious 'Stink'
and love to watch you laugh and play

Aaron, my handsome slobber monkey
how you fill my heart with joy
Thank you God for blessing me
with my family full of boys!



You should have warned me to grab a tissue for this one!

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