hmmmmm

Well, I guess it's all starting to hit me now what all has happened. I have one more day left to be done at the apt, and I think I am subconciously putting it off because it makes everything official.

Living with family is going to be harder than I thought. Not because of them, but me. I feel that if we are going to be later coming in, we owe them the curtousy of telling them so. Or if I want to wait and pick up a mess later, I don't feel I have that right cause it's not my house. It's been 10yrs since i've lived with someone *other than John. It's like being in highschool with curfews and rules all over again.

I miss MY kitchen, MY bathroom, and MY way of doing things. But that will come again soon. I think it's my mental point of view that's my problem right now. See when we decided to do this just until we found a place we liked, we still had income. Now, it could be a longer arrangement and i'm not really looking forward to that.

But, despite all of my whining i'm enjoying spending time with my family while Johns home. The important thing is that we are all together, healthy and safe!

Yogurt, junk and spenda...my ramblings

I have been having a problem with thrush lately (I know TMI) so I have started eating yogurt...yuck!!! I love the flavors but three bites into it, the texture takes over and makes me feel like I could get sick. I really wish I could stand the stuff. I watch the commercials and think, Well maybe I might like it now...yeah, not so much. Maybe one day?

Junk, Oh my goodness... how does one collect so much of it? We are STILL moving and have all the big stuff moved. Now it's just the little stuff like papers that you don't really want, but need like old utility bills and whatnot. I swear every time we go to bed, the stuff grows and makes more junk for me to deal with. I'm so ready for it to all be over with, because packing with a toddler and fussy baby is not the easiest thing in the world. But 2 more days and it should all be over with.

Aaaand to deal with this stress I need a boost in the mornings. Since yogurt is gross I bought the smoothie shake things. Not too bad. I try a new one and blech...splenda. This stuff does not taste like the real stuff and I can tell if it was used to make something. Not a fan. Real sugar is much better. But that's probably because I usually tend to be anti healthy. If it says diet or fat free, you guessed it...not my thing.

I have so many things swirling around i my head right now, but these were the only things I could make sense of so here ya go folks...enjoy!

Oh on a positive note, we got our tax papers today, so tomorrow time to file the old tax return. Wooohoooo!!!!!!!


oh and fyi, the keyboard i'm using sticks really bad. I try to catch my typin errors but...so please excuse :)

2010

Well, it's a new year and a new change to everything is coming. Must be because i'm actually posting a blog!!! :P

We have had many changes in our lives lately. November 1st, Aaron finally made his way to the world. He is such a joy (even when screaming at me) and I LOVE watching him and Seth bond. Seth is such a good big brother and a huge help. I'm not sure what I would do without him!

We are moving from our apt because the electricity is outrageous, but that's a whole other post. We are going to be bouncing back and forth between family till we find what we are looking for. It will be an adjustment for everyone, but i'm exciting about spending more time with family.

The move we decided to make ended up being a blessing because Jan. 5th, John was laid off from his job after 5 years with the company. The economy hit their company had and just not bringing in business for title work. This too has been a good thing. Since Aug. John has been working a 2nd job and gone all the time. It doesn't take long of two people never seeing each other to lose touch with the other person. When he was home, we both got the kids taken care of and before we knew it we'd both passed out from exhaustion and never spoken to each other. In just one week, it's been so nice getting to know the man I married all over again. :P

I have so many Seth stories that I need to write down so I have a record of them. He never ceases to amaze me with what he comes up with. He is such an amazing little boy and I just stare at him and wonder where it came from?!!!

So, I know this was a random post of thoughts and ramblings, but now that I am back with internet this site will be up and hoppin soon!

still hangin' in!

Well Folks,

Seems like it's been 700 yrs since my last post, and may be that long again till the next. We are in a responsibility battle right now. Verizon says that everything is fine on their end and the dead phone jacks are the apt. responsibility, while the apt says the line from the box to the apt is fine, Verizon needs to come install a main line (which they will not do). So needless to say that leaves us paying for phone/internet that we are not being able to use and right now seems no hope of a happy ending :(

So when I can at my parents or my in-laws I will check in.

I have a LOT of things going around in my head and I am not sure where to even begin? So I think I will end for today by saying that I'm not sure what God's future has in store for us, how many more hills we can climb only to find ourselves back in a deep valley. But I am trying my best to hold onto God's promises that he will take care of us and especially to the one that he will never give us more than we can handle. I feel I have reached that point but maybe God thinks I am stronger than what I feel right now. I am trying hard to change my thinking and not be so controling~which is VERY hard for me. It is a daily battle but I know with the Lord's help we will come out on top...eventually!

I am praying for all my friends that I know are in the same situation that we are all brought through soon.

God

God moves in mysterious ways...I have said that and heard that a billion times. But it became very real to me tonight!

I haven't posted in a while because we've been moving and do not have the computer set up at the new house, but I drove over here because I just HAD to share what happened to me tonight and give praise to a wonderful God!!!

I was at Bible study tonight and some really powerful stuff has hit me during the course of this study on Esther by Beth Moore. Tonight's was on fear (Esther's fear of talking to the King...it's good stuff, go read and find out why) Anyway, afterwards one of my friends came up to me and said she had something for me. She told me how strange this was going to seem but after going home, she recieved something in the mail...for me!!!! It had an envelope inside and on the front these were the instructions:

Top Secret Mission
1. Hand deliver this envelope to Kristi Shilling
2. Kristi, you are not allowed to ask ANY questions
3. friend, you are not allowed to ask ANY qestions
4. Kriti, open alone
5. Kristi, do not attempt to find out any information about this. Just obey
6. Just deliver, no questions, no comments. This didn't even happen


Inside was a card:

Life's Pathway

At times life's path
seems filled with things
that make the going rough,
And we wish there were
a smoother road
for we feel we've had enough...

But if we pause a moment
and remember Who's in charge,
The hills that loom ahead of us
no longer seem to large.
And every rock before us
when we know we're not alone,
becomes, no just a stumbling block,
but one more stepping stone


Inside:
You've overcome so many things,
and ever time you've grown
Through sheer determination
and the wisdom that you've shown.
So as you face this journey
fromt he moment you begin,
Kinow that I will guide you
and you'll have the strenght to win

Underneath this it was signed God

The contents of this envelope contained a gift card to Walmart for $100.00



Now you can't imagine my shock, disbelief and honestly complete relief to find this. I share this with you not as a pity party and surely not to upset my husband in any way but to give God glory for always meeting a need.

As I said earlier we moved and as most of you know...moving is expensive!!!!! Even if you move within the same town, you pay first months, deposit, transfer fees and just extra in getting back and forth. So this month we were paid and after rent/deposit/bills we had exactly $2.00 left at the end of payday. BUT, we hadn't had a chance to get groceries or gas yet. Now I needed to get groceries before the move but waited and was going to get them later...that didn't happen.

We have been hauling bags around in the back of the car staying with either my parents or his for the time being because of an air conditioning problem at the new house. So we had meals in the evening there, but this past week when we went back to the house and toughed out the heat, not a lot to eat. Let me tell you, if I eat another bologna sandwich...

But I am thankful we did have bologna to eat. We had our very last piece of bread tonight and only one piece of sandwich meat left that we were saving for Seth and then, Well, I didn't know what we were going to do till next payday. I know we could have gone to our parents but they have done sooooo much to help and 3 extra mouths is a lot to feed.

I can't express to you what a blessing this was for us. I haven't really quit crying yet, nor has it really sunk in yet that we can go get groceries. I know this is very selffish of me and now that this has happened, I realize just how petty it was. But Friday is John's birthday and it's the big 3-0. I knew we couldn't go out to eat and more than anything I at least wanted to be able to have him at least a small cake or something to celebrate. I had already apologized and told him to please not be expecting anything because it just didn't work out but we could do something after payday. He is such a wonderful man and didn't give it a second thought.

People I can't tell you how wonderful God is. I have been blessed with a wonderful husband, son, baby on the way. And it may not have been much or what we wanted but we did have sandwiches to sustain us to this point. And now, we are able to get us some groceries and it's a walmart giftcard so that's even gas for the vehichles. I honestly can't tell you if it really just appeared out of nowhere into her mailbox, if she really did it and just won't tell me (i broke the rules and tried to find out) or if someone did mail it to her and she nor I will ever know from who. All I can say is THANK YOU!!!!! Thank you God because it all came from you, and thank you to ? for being the person led by God to meet a need for my family.

I'm not even going to spell check this, reread for gramatical errors, so I apologize if it's the biggest bunch of mess you've ever read. But before I can close my eyes tonight, I have to know that I have shared what a wonderful God I serve!

New friends

Last night Seth had the best time ever!

Two of the little boys in our neighborhood stopped by to see his motorcycle. They had water guns with them, so Seth wanted to go get his toy gun to show them. He came inside to get it but the boys left cause they had to go home. It was awful, he cried and cried and was sooo upset. "I wanted to show those boys my gun too" I felt so bad.

John asked him if he wanted to go back outside and play basketball and that finally got him calmed down. He was outside for maybe 10 min with John when the boys came back, but this time they had ALL the other neighborhood kids with them. All the boys stopped to talk to Seth, he was so excited. I was making super but grabbed his gun so he could have it ready this time and met him at the door looking for it. There were probably 10 boys playing with him in the front yard from 7-12yrs old. They took turns with him and let him shoot their water guns, chased him around the yard and played catch with him.

When he came in for supper he was wound up and through the roof. But so excited because "all those big boys came to play with him and they are my new friends". '

If I see them walking or playing today I am for sure going to thank them for making my little boys night last night! That was very nice of them :)

Play time

Both Seth and I spent the weekend sick but are doing much better now. We spent all day Monday in the car and Tuesday we were going for a walk but the rain set in. I surprised Seth by taking him to chick fil a to play with some of his friends and he and I both had a great time. He ran off energy and I got to talk with the momma's. When I told John we were going he was excited and said that Seth had asked him to pray the night before that he would get to play with some friends tomorrow. God answered his precious little prayer with the help of Ben, Trey and Kiefer!

Later that day after nap, he informed me that Jingle Bells had told him that she wanted to go to the puppy store where she could walk on her feet. So off to Petco we went. He was so cute holding her in the car and leading her around the store. I'm glad we got her and they have become the best of buds!!!! When his Mema came to pick him up, she was so depressed, she laid at the front door and cried for him. I tried to make her feel better but she was mad at me because I'm the one that made her go back inside and wouldn't let her go with him. She won't look at me and runs away if I try to pet her. I bet she changes her tune at dinner time!!!!! :P